she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Sext me about skeletons
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize
