you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize
