Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
