Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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