At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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