he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Randomize
