I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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