There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
