South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Randomize
