I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
