its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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