i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
