Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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