Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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