So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
