Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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