Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
