So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
