brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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