I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
