ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
