After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
