singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
