Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
