Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
My vagina is very pro this idea
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize