i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Randomize