I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
