Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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