Your tits are I can't wait for
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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