The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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