we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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