it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
