bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
