If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
