I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
