Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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