Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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