Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
