break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
