Can i not drive my cunt home
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
