never play flip cup with pint glasses
you would pick up someone in the library
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
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