It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
not ubering you a puppy
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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