she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Also, beer. Big fan.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Randomize
