I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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