What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize