either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
It was confusing and full of hummus
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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