well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Randomize
