hotel room ftw
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
