So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
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