C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
